si DRANZEL ng buhay ko..

nabanggit ko din sa hulihan ng post ko about first year si Draenzel ng buhay ko..sino nga ba si Dranzel?? ano ang naging papel niya sa paglimot ko kay ----??

sa totoo lang, hindi totoong napagtakpan ni Dranzel si ---, kasi hanggang 4th yr. mejo kinikilig pa rin ako kay ---. si dranzel, isa lang naman siya sa milyon-milyon kong lalaki (sa panaginip). oo, marami akong lalaki sa panaginip. hanggang sa pagtulog ko kasi ay hindi ako nagsasawang mangarap. pero naman, baka isipin niyo wala akong lalaki sa totoong buhay aa..marami...isa na si dranzel.

sino ba si dranzel??

-- kaklase ko siya noong first year.

anong naging relasyon mo sa kanya bukod sa nabanggit??

--ka- m.u ko lang naman siya.

oo, m.u lang ang inabot namin. di naisakatuparan ang lahat. bakit?? halina't usisain natin ang aking nakaraan...

sa kalagitnaan ng pakikipaglandian ko kay ---, biglang sumulpot si dranzel. sa pagkakatanda ko, hindi kami close. magka-grupo lang kami noon sa science. madalas ipagtabuyan siya sa grupo namin dahil sinasabi nilang wala siyang silbi. pero sa totoo lang, siya ay may sense...di lang pinakikinggan. naawa naman ako kaya kinakausap ko siya...hanggang don na lang ang naging turingan namin. natatandaan ko din na pareho kaming sumali sa isang religious org sa school at nagretreat kami overnight sa school. kagroup ko din siya noon at kahampasan ng throw pillow sa ibabaw ng patong patong na foam. pero hanggang don lang yun. hanggang sa dumating ang araw ng planong pagpapraktis ng dula sa Ibong Adarna. kakaunti lang kaming nagsipunta at isa siya doon. wala kaming ginawa kundi ang kumain at magharutan. ewan ko kung anong nangyari...ang naaalala ko na lang, kumakain kami ng junk food tapos binigyan niya ako ng mr. chips (yes, naaalala pa!). tapos nagkakwentuhan kami sa isang sulok. tuwang tuwa ako noon sa binti niya...kasi, di tulad ng ibang lalaki, napakapino at ang ganda ng bagsak ng buhok niya sa paa. yun yata ang dahilan kung bakit ko siya nagustuhan ee..pero wala pa tayo dun.

simula noon naging malapit na kami sa isa't isa. hindi ko talaga maalala kung paano ee basta close na kami!! minsan nga, nagpapraktis ang lahat sa classroom, e dahil isa lamang akong hamak na scriptwriter, matapos ko magawa ang script ay inichapwera na lang ako sa isang tabi. nakaupo ako non, tahimik na nanunood sa walang kakwenta kwentang praktis. bigla siyang tumabi sa akin. nagkakwentuhan kami. di ko maalala ang eksaktong usapan namin (wa kong pake!) pero naaalala ko pa ang mismong ginagawa namin..nagtatawanan kami as in kami lang tapos wala kaming pakealam sa paligid. tapos pinipilit ko siyang ipakita ang binti niya...para akong naglilihi...payag naman siya..tapos nagkikilitian kami...basta! maya-maya may gumulo s usapan namin. sabi niya, kanina pa daw niya ako tinatawag pero busy daw ako kay dranzel. letche tameme ako nun a!haha..

simula noon ,naging tawagan na namin ni dranzel ay pangit at buhok. pangit talaga kaso iniba ko ang akin ginawa kong buhok in honor of his legs!!haha!!

edi ayun close na nga kami. araw araw na kaming nag uusap. tumatabi na siya sa akin lagi. (sa right side ko lang kasi yung seatmate kong si --- laging nasa upuan niya e nasa left ko siya.). basta nagiging sweet na kami, marami ng nakakahalata. may insidente pa nga na umupo siya sa left ko kasi di nakaupo doon si ---, nakikipaglandian siya noon kay "Ona". edi syempre selos ako diba..babae yun e..edi di ko siya pinansin. tinuon ko ang atensyon ko kay dranzel. magkadikit kami as in..magkaharap sa isa't isa habang nagngingitian at masayang nag uusap. nasa gitna ako ng pag-iilusyon ng lumapit si --- at pinaalis si dranzel sa upuan niya. nagalit ako sa kanya noon. paano, di naman pala siya uupo.

nung umupo na siya, e galit nga ako diba...lumayo ako sa kanya, tumalikod. sabi niya, ok lang daw umupo kahit sino, wag lang si dranzel. nagtataka ako kasi magkaibigan sila at dati ok lang sa kanyang maghapon kaming magdaldalan ni dranzel habang nasa upuan niya. strict na si loves kaya di na ko umimik. matagal ko siyang di kinikibo. ng makaramdam, siya na kumakausap sa akin. ok na lang, me right side pa naman e. pero pag nasa right si dranzel, kinukuha niya ang monobloc at pumapagitna sa amin (aisle kasi sa right ko bago ang sunod na upuan).

yun. hanggang sa kinuha ni dranzel ang number ko. naging textmate kami at lalo kaming napalapit sa isa't isa. hanggang sa bakasyon, nagkwento siya tungkol sa first love niya. ok naman...maya-maya bigla niyang tinanong (sa text yun a kasi nagtetext kami), "gusto mo ba malaman kung sino 2nd love ko??" sabi ko, "sino??", sabi niya, "ikaw.". whatda!!! tumigil ang mundo ko dun aa!! napatulala ako sa cellphone ko, lalo na, alipin pa sakto ang pineplay sa radio..theme song naming 2 yun. tae di ko alam gagawin ko. oo, me nararamdaman na ako para sa kanya...as in in-love na din ako sa kanya...yun na ee...tinatanong na niya ako kung pwedeng maging kami...sa kasamaang palad, nasa kalagitnaan ako ng identity crisis noon (feeling ko lalaki ako)...at sobrang na-shock ako sa sinabi niya. lam niyo sinabi ko?? sinabi ko sa kanya na tibo ako at di ko siya gusto!!!!

umiyak siya nun. nagkita pa kami at yun. yun nga. sbai niya ok lang daw kahit tibo pa ako, actually di siya naniniwala pero sabi niya kahit ano pa daw ako mahal niya ako. tae binasted ko talaga.

nawalan kami ng communication matapos kunin ng bruha kong tita ang sim ko at ipinalit ang sim niya.

kung tatanungin niyo ako kung nagsisisi ako, OO SOBRANG NAGSISISI AKO!!!! kung nakinig lang sana ako sa puso ko diba...naman!!!kaya ng di rin totoo na "sundin ang utak wag ang puso" kasi mas masakit pag utak..di ka na sumaya, nagsisi ka pa. sayang talaga yun.

matagal din kaming di nagkakausap. di na kami naging magkaklase hanggang 4th year. muli kaming nagbati noong 3rd year ng maging student teacher ako. nitong 4th year, angkatext kami ulit at pinilit niyang pag usapan namin yung nangyari sa amin. sinisisi niya ako tungkol dun. sabi niya, may feelings pa siya ngayon pero malayo na daw kami sa isa't isa. naiyak ako. ewan. basta. naiyak ako. nagpasya na lang kaming maging friends na lang. noong outing nga ng batch namin, ang bait niya sa akin, pero halatang nagkakailangan pa kami. lalo na nung magkayakap kami sa pool..akala ko may kissing scene na magaganap pero wala. nakita ko ang lungkot sa mata niya. at sa tuwing magkatext kami o nagkikita katulad nung sa pool, lagi niyang binubulong sa akin ... "ikaw kasi ee, edi sana hanggang ngayon tayo pa.."

sabi niya, para sa kanya naging kami. edi ganun na rin sa akin.

pag naaalala ko siya, nalulungkot talaga ako. mahal ko siya. minahal ko siya.

...bakit 'siya' ang dahilan ng pananatili ko sa MIPSS..

masyado akong natuwa ng mabasa ko ang post ko (ang pinaka masayang part noong first year high school). lahat kasi ng yun nag-flashback sa akin...at infairness,, sobrang kilig na kilig naman ang lola niyo!!

well, kung mapapansin niyo, may nakalagay sa huling mensahe na..."kung alam niya lang sana na siya ang dahilan chuva chuva...".

well, dito, ipaliliwanag ko ang bagay na yon.

natapos na ang first year. magsesecond year na ako (malamang). bakasyon noon pero ilang linggo na lang e pasukan na. nagpunta kami ng Papa ko sa MIPSS. papasok kami ng gate ng mapahinto ako sandali at sinabi kong, "Pa, ayoko na dito mag-aral, lilipat na ako". nagpatuloy kami sa paglalakad. habang naglalakad, tinatanong ako ni Papa kung san ko gustong mag-aral. napahinto uli ako nung nasa loob na kami (sa harap ng DLC Room). doon, binigyan ako ni Papa ng 3 choices, MIPSS, SNEA o Perps. wala akong gusto ni isa pero makaalis lang ng MIPSS gusto ng sabihin ng bibig ko na Perps. Desidido na talaga ako. ng magdesisyon ako, lumapit si Papa sa Principal para sabihing magtatransfer na ako at kukunin na namin ang mga kailangan namin. naiwan akong nakatayo sa kinatatayuan ko, mag-isa. ng maya-maya, napabaling ang tingin ko sa court namin, at doon nakita ko si ----!! nakatingin din siya sa akin, at san ka pa, nginitian niya ako ng bonggang bongga!!!!

parang natunaw ang kaluluwa ko sa ginawa niya!! tila ba nagkaroon ako bigla ng pakpak at lumutang sa alapaap ng mga sandaling yun. ng magbalik ako sa katinuan, sinundan ko ang Papa ko at sinabi kong, "Pa, nagbago isip ko, mag-enroll na tayo."

ayan ang buong kwento..

kung tatanungin niyo ako kung nagsisisi ba ako sa naging desisyon ko, oo, kasi di naman kami naging magkaklase nung 2nd year at mas naging miserable pa ang buhay ko sa paaralang iyon. pero wala akong masisisi kundi ang sarili ko lang...pero di rin..nabulag lang naman ako ng pagmamahal sa taong yun (kung sino man siya!!hahaha!!). ayan, sa susunod aa..wag padadala masyado sa panandaliang aliw at kaluwalhatian...magsisisi ka rin sa huli!!

pero gayunpaman, masaya pa din ako..dahil siya ang dahilan...siya lang...

ai..bago pala ako magtapos..(ending na ee me naalala pa ko!!amp!!)..trivia lang aa..para sa mga taong di nakakakilala at nakakakilala sa akin..yung nickname ko na 4 letter word (nickname ko nung highschool partikular na noong 3rd yr-4th yr.) ay sa kanya din nag umpisa. Minsan kasi, napatingin siya sa notebook ko (hilig niyang pakealaman ang gamit ko), tapos binasa niya full name ko. bigla niyang nabanggit ang isang kakilala niya na ang pangalan ay pinaiksing pangalan ko. sabi ko kilala ko yun. sabi niya, yun na ang itatawag niya sa akin. kaya sa totoo lang, siya talaga ang unang tumawag sa akin nun. at dahil sa crush ko nga siya ng bonggang bongga, yun na ang ginamit kong nickname hanggang matapos sa high school.

Ilan pang karagdagan, noong me 20 pesos siya at kailangan niya ng barya, nagpabarya siya sa akin. (todo hanap talaga ako ng barya makuha lang ang 20 niya!). sa kasamaang palad, kulang ang barya ko at puro 20 na rin pera ko. nalungkot siya kaya naman nagmadali akong hagilapin ang kaibigan ko at nagpabarya sa kanya..at yun nga, napasakamay ko ang 20 ng pinakamamahal ko. hanggang ngayon ay nasa akin pa iyon, nakalagay sa loob ng bote ng mineral water na ginamit niya noon na kinuha ko (basurera ako). kasama noon ang ilang bagay na tulad ng papel na may pirma niya at papel na nakalagay ang best in biology noong 2nd year at pareho kaming nandoon. mahalaga para sa akin ang 20 pesos na iyon dahil sa tuwing hinahawakan ko iyon, pinapaalala nito ang texture ng kanyang balat.

at minsan, may nakahalatang kaklase ko na may crush ako ke --- dahil siya lang ang lagi kong binibigyan ng 5 piso sa libo libong pulubing nanlimos sa akin.

yun lang. the end.~

AnG piNaKa maSaYnG parT nooNg First Year High School...:)

Hay,,,hindi koh talaga gusto mag-aral sa MIPSS nun. Kasi di koh siya type. Akala ko kase di ako sasaya...di pala...kase...nagkaroon ako ng mga kaibigan...hehe...pero syempre nagkaroon din ako ng crush...at ang swerte ko kasi seatmate ko siya...at siya ay walang iba kundi si *¦?♥µ. Grabeh..ansaya-saya talaga...at alam niyo ba kung baket siya??? Well,,,basahin niyo toh...

3rd grading nun. Naging ritwal na ni Ms. Leizel (adviser namin) na pagpalitpalitin kami ng seating arrangement. Pinapapila niya kami sa labas at siya na bahala kung san upuan namin. Una, boys muna. Then girls. Si ----, nakaupo siya sa may gitna. Katapat niya sa left ay si “Vansay”. Ang itinabi kay “Vansay” ay si “Ona”. Sa takot na baka makatabi niya sina “Bbhell” at “Zhelle”, nakipagpalit siya kay “Vansay”. Tapos, tsempong ako na...at itinabi ako kay “Vansay” (dating inuupuan ni ---- ang upuan ngayon ni “Vansay”). So, akoh,,,tuwang-tuwa. Kasi, dream come true na...nakatabi ko na rin sa wakas ang crush ng lahat...pero 10 minutes ko lang siyang nakapiling. Kase, nakipagpalit ulet sa kanya si ----. Tinanong ko siya kung baket. Sabi niya,,,wag lang daw niyang makatabi si “Bbhell” at “Zhelle” ayos na siya. Pero bakit di na lang siya nakuntento dun kay “ Ona”. Well,, ala na ko nagawa. Pero ang hirap niya maging seatmate. Pano, nahihirapan akong kumilos kasi sobrang close ng chairs namin. One time, napansin niyang me panyong nakatali sa bag ko...natanggal yon. Hinatak ko ang panyo para itali...pero hinatak niya rin...yun, naghatakan kami. Tapos sabi ko bitiwan na niya...tapos alam niyo ba kung ano ang nangyari? Aksidenteng naipatong ang...kamay niya...kayo ah! Sa kamay ko tapos sabi niya...”tulungan na kita”...Gosh!!! grabeh...iz the start of something new nah!!! Maingay siyang katabi...parati siyang kumakanta...kinakausap niya ako...pero kadalasan di ko siya kinakausap kasi fault finder siya...as in pag me mali,,,pansin niya agad...at marami siyang comments...natatakot akong baka pagtawanan niya ako pag nagkamali ako. Pag checking nga eh...kinakabahan ako kasi siya mag-checheck...pero buti na lang minsan pareho o mas mataas ang score ko sa kanya. One time nga eh,,,electronics namin. Me practical...di ko alam ang tawag dun. Nung ako na,,,inaasar ako ng mga classmates ko kay “Allyn”. Pagbalik ko sa upuan ko, binuksan niya ang wallet niya at pinakita sa akin
Ang pix nilang dalawa habang sinasabing...”’Allyn’ ka pala ah!” hay,,,kung alam niya lang...na dati lang ako me kwash ke “Allyn”. Well, di naman masyadong masaya ang 3rd grading kasi maigsi lang...mas maganda nung 4th na... isang linggo ng 4th quarter...akala ko nga di na pagpapalitin ng chairs...keya lang Friday nun...pinapila uli kami sa labas at palitan na ulet ng seating arrangement. Nakakalungkot nga eh...pero naisip ko nung time na yon,,,baka kelangan na nga naming maghiwalay. Then ito na...pinapalabas na ang lahat...pero kaming dalawa andun pa sa chairs namin. Sabi ko,,,”Ok na poh ako dito...wag niyo na po palitan”...keya lang bigla kong naisip na baka mahalata niyang me gusto ako sa kanya kaya dinugtungan ko...”Ok na po pwesto ko...kahit seatmate na lang po ang palitan niyo”. Tapos bigla siyang nagsalita...sabi niya”ako ok na rin. Wag ng palitan ang seating arrangement...pati seatmate”. Grabeh!!! Kinilig talaga ako non! Pero sabay kaming tumayo at lumabas na ako...kasi siya lumapit muna sa adviser namin at nakipag-chismisan. Then, pinapili yung boys kung san nila gusto umupo...basta wag lang sila tabi-tabi. Nung ako na,,,sabi ko sa tabi na lang ni “Shua” kasi yun ang dati kong upuan...pero ipinilit ng adviser namin na dun ako sa tabi ni----. Grabeh!!! Anlupit ng tadhana...nakisama! pakipot pa ako nung una pero umupo na rin ako. Nakakaasar siya kasi di man lang siya nag-react o nagreklamo man lang...pero masaya naman! Then...start na!!! ng pinakamasaya sa lahat...dahil mahaba-haba ang fourth quarter, mahaba-haba din ang kaligayahan ko. Ngeon, medyo napapadalas na ang pag-uusap namin. Kaya lang nung una, nahihiya pa ako sa kanya kaya madalas na lang siyang nakikipagkwentuhan kay “Arz” na nasa left side niya. Nakakaasar nga eh! Pero one time, tinanong ako ni----. Bakit daw di ko siya kinakausap. Sabi ko, wala lang. tsaka madalas pag kinakausap ko siya di ako natingin sa kanya...yoko nga!!! Baka mabaliw na ako eh! Then one day, nag-check kami ng assignment sa math. Pinipilit niyang alamin ang score ko...pero ayoko. Pero nung sinabi niya ang score niya at mas mataas ako sa kanya, sinabi ko na rin. Hehe... One time pa nga eh, nagdidiscuss ang computer teacher namin ng mapansin kong nakatingin siya sa amin. Pagtingin ko, di pala maayos ang upo naming dalawa. Parang nakasandal kami sa isa’t isa...basta di ko ma-explain! Then umayos ako ng upo...pati siya. Then one time, nakikipagdaldalan siya...biglang nalaglag yung panyo niya sa loob mismo ng bag ko. Naisip ko, isara ko na kaya ang bag ko para akin na yung panyo niya. Pero sa kasamaang palad, naunahan ako ng konsensiya...kaya ibinalik ko sa kanya ang panyo niya. Then one time den nakapatong yung siko ko sa upuan niya. Nakikipagdaldalan siya kay “Stiv” nun ng biglang nahulog ang panyo ko sa ano niya. (oi, di ko sinadya yun ah!) nagdalawang isip ako kung kukunin ko...pero ansama ko naman kung kukunin ko yun...masyado kong pinagsasamantalahan ang kahinaan niya...tapos nung napansin niya, kinuha niya at ibinalik sa akin...nag-sorry ako...ok lang daw yun...gosh! Then one time din...mapeh time. Kantahan nun. Nanghiram siya ng libro sa akin kasi tinatamad daw siyang kunin sa locker ang kanya. Buti na lang dinala ko ang mapeh book ko nung araw na iyon. Kinakanta niya ang kumbaya. Pinapakinggan ko lang siya. Sabi niya sabay daw kami...yoko nga! Panget boses ko...kaya sabi ko pakikinggan ko na lang siya. Tapos niyakap-yakap niya ang book ko!!! Grabe na toh! Then one time, checking nun sa ibong adarna. Sabi ng filipino teacher namin, kelangan daw me pirma. Eh nakita niya na ang pirma ko ay may kasamang smiley face. Sabi niya ang ganda daw ng pirma ko...tapos nilagyan niya rin ng smiley face yung book ko...sabi niya para daw pareho kami. Simula nun tuwing may ichecheck kami, laging me smiley face after ng signature. Then one time den pumunta ang teacher ng SPED at ibang SPED sa room namin para sa isang survey. Pinasulat nila kami sa one-eight ng course na gusto namin sa college. Syempre nilagay ko management engineering. Tapos pinipilit niya akong sabihin sa kanya ang course ko. Sabi ko siya muna. Sabi niya computer engineering...pinagmalaki pa niya ah! So yun, pinakita ko na rin ang papel ko. Madalas na rin kaming magkwentuhan...one time nga nagkwento siya about sa kanya. Sinabi pa nga niya sa akin ng may pagmamalaki kung saan siya ipinanganak. Pero nung tinanong ko siya kung asan ang parents niya...wala. Di ko na siya pinilit. Ito pa,,,pag nakatalikod siya sa aken, pinapatong ko ang siko ko sa upuan niya...pero bigla siyang lumingon at nakita niya akong inialis ang kamay ko. Akala ko magagalit siya...pero sabi niya ok lang daw sa kanya yun...tapos nag-seatwork kami sa Science. By partner. Sabi ni Sir partner niya daw si “Zhelle”. Di siya pumayag. Gagaya na lang daw siya sa akin na individual kasi kung pumayag siya, kapartner ko dapat si “Chler” o si “Migz”. So, wala ng nakapigil sa kanya...kasi sobrang simangot na ang mukha niya...pero maya-maya...kinausap niya ako at nagtanong siya tungkol sa seatwork. Sabi ko, bakit kasi di pa siya pumayag na me kapartner. Sabi niya...ayaw niya kay “Zhelle” kasi aasarin lang daw siya...tapos English time non. Kinuha niya ang plastic na upuan tapos inilagay niya sa right side ko at umupo siya don. Umupo naman si “Chler” sa upuan niya. Humarap ako kay “Chler” habang nakapatong ang kamay niya sa desk ko. Eh me ginagawa ako non. Me tinanong ako kay “Chler” pero di niya alam. Marami akong tinanungan na kapitbahay ko...except sa kanya...pero nung wala na talaga...nilakasan ko na lang ang loob ko na magtanong sa kanya...natakot nga ako eh...pero anong ginawa niya? Sabi niya di niya alam...tapos lumapit siya sa English teacher namin at tinanong yun...bait naman niya!!! Ang nakakainis lang sa kanya,,,pag minsan umaalis siya sa upuan niya...me umuupo dun tapos nakikipagdaldalan ako...paaalisin niya at uupo siya! Ang bastos kaya! Kaaczar! Tsaka alam niyo ba...di naman sa nagfifeeling ako...pero madalas ko siyang nahuhuling nakatingin sa aken...pero wala na akong sinabing iba ah...yun lang...masaya lang ako...tapos dati, mahilig siyang mag-ayos ng buhok at magpulbo sa mukha ng sobrang dami. Kinalabit niya ako...(yung nakakainis na style niya ng pagkalabit) tapos tinanong niya ako kung cute daw ba siya sa buhok niya...eh diba nga di ako tumitingin sa mukha niya kasi nahihiya ako...so sinabi ko oo kahit di ko siya tiningnan...pero kinulit niya ako...tingnan ko daw...edi wala na akong nagawa...then dati rin yun nga marami siyang pulbo sa mukha...tinanong niya kung pantay na daw...sabi ko hindi...tapos sabi niya ayusin ko daw...sabi ko “ay ok na pala” pero mapilit siya at sinabing”hindi eh niloloko mo ako, ayusin mo na!” so, humingi ako ng panyo sa kanya pero sabi niya ala daw...yoko namang gamitin ang panyo ko...sabi niya kamay ko na lang daw...sabi ko madumi...tapos tiningnan niya...sabi niya di naman daw...kaya inayos ko na...at nahawakan ko ang mukha niya!!! Sana huminto na lang ang oras nung panahon na iyon... tapos dati rin nanghiram sa kanya ng ballpen si “Birdie” di niya pinahiram...tapos mga ilang araw matapos nag pangyayaring yon, ako naman ang nawalan ng ballpen. Ewan ko basta bigla na lang nawala...natakot ako pero nabigla ako ng pahiramin niya ako...tinanong ko siya kung di siya magagalit...sabi niya indi daw! Tapos p.e namin. Naglaro kami ng tayaan (MOD). Nagalit si ---- nung tinaya siya ni “Eza”. Natakot nga ako nun eh. Kaya nung umupo ako di ko siya kinausap. Pero kinausap niya ako. Tinanong ko sa kanya kung galit siya sa akin...dahil dun sa laro namin...sabi niya hindi naman daw...eh bakit si “Eza”? kasi sabi niya nakulitan daw siya...nung tinanong ko kung nakulitan din siya sa akin...sabi niya di naman daw...hay salamat! Pero sa lahat, ito ang di ko malilimutan. Computer non, siya ang nag-dictate ng answer. Always, sa akin niya pinapacheck ang kanya. Eh andami. Lunch na pero di pa rin ako tapos. Inuna ko na ang kanya. Nung natapos ko ang kanya, sabi ko, mag-lunch na siya at wag na niyang intayin ang one-fourth ko kasi di ko na-check ang akin maxado. Pero sabi niya iintayin na lang daw niya ako. Umupo siya sa upuan niya at tiningnan niya ang chenechekan ko. Habang nagchecheck, sabi ko kumain na siya...pero ayaw niya. busy ako sa pagchecheck, e may itatanong ako sa kanya so lumingon ako sa likod (nakatalikod kasi ako s upuan niya) e sakto nilapit niya sarili niya sa akin...omg...!!!! muntik na kaming mag-kiss!!! nahiya nga kami pareho tapos natahimik...natigilan bigla...grabe anlapit niya sa akin. Ramdam ko nga ang temp ng kanyang katawan eh...tapos nung tapos na, sabay kaming tumayo at lumabas...di na niya inintay ang ibang papel ng ibang classmate namin...keya lang hiwalay na kami pagdating sa pinto kasi sa kabilang canteen ako kumakain...grabe...saya ko talaga nun. Pero dapat lang talaga niyang gawin yon kasi ako ay nag-check ng dalawang filler...kala niya ah! natatawa rin ako sa kanya sa tuwing di niya ko pinapansin..naalala ko noon praktis namin sa ibong adarna play, humiga si J sa lap ko, alam niyo ba sabi ng kaklase ko parang biglang tumamlay si ----. tapos nung inayos na uli yung mga upuan di niya ko kinakausap, pag kinakausap ko siya, sumasagot naman siya pero di siya tumitingin ng diretso sa akin. ganun din siya pag magkasama kami ni dranzel. Pero ito ang embarrassing moment ko. Gumagawa kami ng project sa CLE...yung rosary...eh me picture si----kay “Zhelle” kaya hiniram ko at inilagay sa ID ko. Di ko naman akalain na makikilala ni “Er” na si ---- yun...kinuha niya sa ID ko ang picture at nagsisisigaw siya na “may crush si Czarina kay ----“ tapos lumapit pa siya kay ----at pinakita ang picture tapos sabi niya “may crush sayo si Czarina...ito nga yung pix sa mo sa ID niya oh...” natakot talaga ako nun. Halos maiyak ako sa pagsisisi...parang ayoko na ngang pumasok kasi baka gawin niya rin sa akin ang ginawa niya kay” Zhelle” nung nalaman niyang nay crush sa kanya ito. So kinabukasan, pagpasok, nakadikit ang chair niya sa upuan ni “Stiv” na nasa harap niya...tapos nakaharap sa likod ang chair niya...di ko inayos...bala siya...tapos umalis ako at nakipagchikahan sa kaibigan ko...tapos biglang sinabi ni “Princess” habang ako’y nakatalikod na inayos daw ni ----ang upuan namin as in pinagdikit niya at pati bag namin...tapos tumingin daw siya sa akin after nun. Gosh! Tapos bell na...morning prayer...then pasok! Natatakot akong umupo...kasi expect ko ng lalayuan na niya ako...pero di pala! Actually, mas naging close kami at parati na kaming nagkwentuhan! Saya nga eh!!! Kaya lang nung matatapos na ang school year mga last na yun...sabi nung mga kabarkada niya...”uy, sabihin mo na sa kanya na may gusto ka sa kanya...hiya ka pa eh” tapos may nakapagsabi sa akin na may crush daw siya kay “Faye”. Tinatanong siya ng mga kabarkada niya kung totoong me gusto siya kay “Faye” pero sabi niya wala naman daw...well, di naman me apektado nun kasi nung mga panahong iyon...dumating na si Dranzel sa buhay ko...kaya yun...

the end.


*kung alam niya lang sana na kaya lang ako nag-aaral pa rin sa MIPSS eh dahil sa kanya...*

lalala...

Sam Milby - Each Passing Night lyrics
Each passing nightI try and close my eyesBut thoughts of youThey wake me upAnd tear me inside out
Each passing nightI ask myself who's rightAnd try to find the reasons whyIt had to end that night
CHORUS1:Didn't we share each other's dreamsWe held each other tightAng tears fell fromm my eyesAs you walked and left me hereLike the wind you passed me byI try but I can't seeIf it's something that I saidBaby please won't you tell me now'Cause it gets harder each passing night
I often prayThat you'd come back and stayWe've had too much togetherTo ever live a partI'll wait and see'Cause I know and I believeSomeday you'll come to realizeWhat you and I can be
CHORUS2:Then we'll share each other's dreamsWe'll held each other tightKiss the tears that burn my eyes'Cause you walked and left me hereLike the wind you passed me byI try but I can't seeIf it's something that I saidBaby, please won't you tell me now'Cause it gets harder each passing night
I never meant to hurt your heart this waySooner or laterThere'd be someone else who'd stay
(Repeat Chorus1 only 1st 4 lines)(Repeat Chorus1)

Lyrics  Sam Milby lyrics - Each Passing Night lyrics

oh...i loooovvveee this song!! it was the song sang by my ex boyfriend when we are at a party of one of our friends last summer. he said he dedicates it to me..aw..it hurts!haha..

well, that guy, i really love him..and i know he loves me too, it's just that i don't want to be a part of him anymore,...for some very serious reasons.

well i don't want to talk much about it know. i've already move on (but not so..). at least now i don't care anymore..it just hurts me everytime i hear the songs he sang for me before.

I miss Class Neodynary..

[humanda.....sa....larangan! hudyat....]

wwwwwooouuuuuuuuwwwwwww!!! nasa kalagitnaan ako ng pagtulog habang nagkaklase sa English subject namin kanina (love ko ang english subject kaso and init sa room kaya anarap matulog) ng biglang nagising ako sa malakas ba sigaw na narinig ko. di ko naiwasang mapa-tion sa kinauupuan ko. buti nga hindi ako tumayo ee (nakakahiya naman yun!) kasi sa isip ko, kailangan kong sumaludo...buti na lang talaga di ko ginawa.

hinanap ko ang pinanggagalingan ng boses (kaso wala akong makita kasi wala naman ako sa bintana). tila ba gusto ko ng magtatatakbo at humarap sa watawat ng Pilipinas ng mga oras na iyon. hinanap ko ang flag pero wala akong nakita.

pag labas namin ng kasama ko, papauwi na kami noon, nakita ko sa court na nakaupo ang mga naka-puting t-shirt, maong at rubbeshoes na dugyuting mga nilalang sa harap ng mga maaangas at mayayabang na 3 babaeng naka-boknay at nakasuot ng gou blue. aba, mukhang may training sila, kakaunti lang ang mga nakaupo kaya halatang mga COQC sila.

nainggit ako.

di ko mapigilang sabihin na..

MISS KO NA ANG CAT.

oo miss ko na talaga.

hindi halata sa akin na ako'y makabayan. isa lamang akong simpleng nilalang na ang pinakekealaman lang ay ang sarili. pero sa kaibuturan ng aking puso, hindi maintindihan ng ga tuldok na bahagi ng akng utak kung bakit gustong gusto kong mag-ROTC.

hindi ako macho, hindi rin ganoon kalakas ang katawan ko kung titingnan ako (pero hindi ako payatot at tababoi), wala lang, simple lang, ni di mo nga mahahalata sa itsura ko na minsan sa buhay ko e dumaan din ako sa mga pamatay na training at naging officer sa CAT noong high school. oo, naging officer ako noon. ewan ko kung paano nangyari yon, kahit ako ay hindi makapaniwala. wala kasi sa kakayahan ko (sa pagkakaalam ko) ang sumabak sa mga ganoong bagay, pero laking pagkakamangha at paghanga ko sa sarili ko sa tuwing naiisip ko na nalagpasan ko ang lahat ng kahihiyang inabot ko sa pagsali sa CAT.

ngayon, nababaliw na nga siguro ako, pero gusto ko talagang sumali sa ROTC. pangarapkong makapag suot ng fatigue. pero bukod dun, ang motibo ko talaga ay ang maglingkod. walang biro. maglingkod.

noon pa man gustong gusto ko ng tumutulong sa kapwa. ayoko ng inuutusan at inaalila ako pero pag CAT ibang usapan na yon. ibang bersyon kasi ng sarili ko ang CAT. ang laki ng pagkakaiba ko sa totoong ako. lahat ng di ko kayang gawin, nagagawa ko, at nagkakaroon ako ng tiwala sa sarili ko.

biruin mo yun, may maganda din palang naidulot sa akin ang CAT. bukod sa pagtambay, pakikipagchismisan, pakornihan at pagsasamantala, natutunan kong kilalanin at intindihin pa ang sarili ko, ang kabilang side ko.

pero basta, gusto ko mag ROTC. nagpaalam na ako sa mama ko, sabi ko kapag may nag-recruit sa akin mag RO, papayag ako agad. pumayag naman siya.

ewan ko ba, minsan nga naisip ko dapat nag criminology na lang ako. weird no??

basta, miss ko na training, "lipaw...humanay!", "rap sa kanan...rap!", "kanang balikat...ta!", "sunurang bilang...na!---'dalawampu't walo, huling bilang na po pinuno!'

shet namimiz ko talaga!!! gusto ko mag-form uli, sumaludo, magbabad sa init, tumayo ng matagal, mag marcha, parusahan, mag squat thrust, kagatin ang head gear, magmadali sa pagbihis, mag-squareback, mag scram, maging uto uto...lahat!! lalo na ang mag - TION!:)

nervous for nothing very important

i really don't have much things to say...I just want to share what I feel right now..

aside from being too bored (everyday I was bored), I felt sooooo nervous today. I don't know why I always feel like this when I wake up. I can't figure out what my day would be...

Will it be happy or would bad luck shower me today??

ahh..I don't want to think negatively but since I'm afraid encountering bad lucks, I think that way.

Well, I what I fear this day is...

1. I would be late in school.

2. I will not be able to attend my first subject again and again and again.

3. I don't know what to wear, uniform or civilian.

4. Will I pass my quiz in Science?? I didn't actually listened to my prof the day of our discussion.

5. Is my assignment in English enough?

6. What bag am I going to bring?

7. Will I go home early?

8. WILL I BE LUCKY TODAY???

Ahh!! This really sucks! I mean..I don't want to worry...but it's what always stays in my mind. The moment I get up from bed, there are lots of things that start to pop up and I will end up worrying about myself the whole day. I don't want this...this gives me an odd feeling and really...it reduces my self confidence!

God, please help me out...I'm begging you!!

a nice novel:)

I already finished this novel entitled "The Catcher in the Rye" by J.D. Salinger. It was a very nice novel. It's about this teenager, Holden who speaks up about his teenage. I'll just post it's summary..

The first-person narrative follows Holden's experiences in New York City in the days following his expulsion from Pencey Prep, a fictional college preparatory school in Pennsylvania.
Holden shares encounters he has had with students and faculty of Pencey, whom he criticizes as being superficial, or as he would say, "phony." After being expelled from the school, Holden packs up and leaves the school in the middle of the night after an altercation with his roommate. He takes a train to New York, but does not want to return to his family's apartment immediately, and instead checks into the derelict Edmont Hotel. There, he spends an evening dancing with three tourist girls and has a clumsy encounter with a prostitute; he refuses to do anything with her and tells her to leave, although he pays her for her time. She demands more money than was originally agreed upon and when Holden refuses to pay he is struck by her pimp.
Holden spends a total of two days in the city, characterized largely by drunkenness and loneliness. At one point he ends up at a museum, where he contrasts his life with the statues of Eskimos on display. For as long as he can remember, the statues have been fixed and unchanging. It is clear to the reader, if not to Holden, that the teenager is afraid and nervous about the process of change and growing up. These concerns may largely have stemmed from the death of his brother, Allie. Eventually, he sneaks into his parents' apartment while they are away, to visit his younger sister Phoebe, who is nearly the only person with whom he seems to be able to communicate. Holden shares a fantasy he has been thinking about (based on a mishearing of Robert Burns' Comin' Through the Rye): he pictures himself as the sole guardian of numerous children running and playing in a huge rye field on the edge of a cliff. His job is to catch the children if they wander close to the brink; to be a "catcher in the rye".
After leaving his parents' apartment, Holden then drops by to see his old English teacher, Mr. Antolini in the middle of the night, and is offered advice on life and a place to sleep. During the speech on life, Mr. Antolini has a number of "highballs," an alcoholic drink popular at the time. His comfort is upset when he wakes up in the night to find Mr. Antolini patting his head in a way that he perceives as "perverty". There is much speculation on whether or not Mr. Antolini was making a sexual advance on Holden, and it is left widely up to the reader whether or not this is true. Holden leaves and spends his last afternoon wandering the city. He later wonders if his interpretation of Mr. Antolini's actions were correct.
Holden intends to move out west, and relays these plans to his sister, who decides she wants to go with him. He refuses to take her, and when she becomes upset with him, he tells her that he himself will no longer go. Holden then takes Phoebe to the Central Park Zoo, where he watches with a melancholy joy as she rides a carousel. At the close of the book, Holden decides not to mention much about the present day, finding it inconsequential. He alludes to "getting sick" and living in a mental hospital, and mentions that he'll be attending another school in September. Holden says that he has found himself missing Stradlater, Ackley, and the others—warning the reader that the same thing could happen to them.

that is the summary. It's really interesting...try to read it if you don't still. It drove me crazy, to finish it, I read it in the middle of the night until the sun rises up!! I can't pass a day without reading it..:)

aw..teenage life really sucks..but then it was the most enjoyable parts of our life..Holden was a little like me...it's just that I don't fail my subjects:) I like his reasoning eventhough I don't literally agree with everything he say...ah..I just love it!

Friday, my favorite day!!

well, i really don't love Friday. It's just that it's the last day of being in school for the week so I like it. i was excited to end up the day.

My first subject is General Psychology. Well, I ws 30 minutes late but I was fortunate because my proffesor allowed me to enter unlike the others who arrived at 8:30. Our class supposed to start at 7. We discussed about anything. Schedule, Sitting arrangement, then our topic, Psychology itself. My professor was funny. Obviously he hate one of my classmate. So do I. That classmate of mine was so 'epal'. On our discussion, one of my classmates said "xerox (pronounced as seroks)" then our prof corrected her and said, "no, it's not xerox (seroks), it's.." he was interuppted by this epal who said, "It's xerox (pronounced as Ziroks)". that killed my prof. Form that moment he kept on annoying my epal classmate. I felt sorry for him:)

Then our next class was CWTS under the NSTP. Actually I want to be in ROTC but I fear the training. I just miss my CAT days in high school. I was an officer then.

Well, this subject is boring. Our teacher is very trying hard in speaking english...I couldn't hear her. So, I just read my book and not listen to her. She grouped us into 6. The grouping was all in a mess. It's because of others who switched groups. There is this fat woman who wanted me to go to group 2 instead of being in 1 but I refused. She's bad. She's the reason why our leader was out of our group. Plus, she doesn't want to do anything. She's a trash!

Well, I'm in the group of that epal classmate of mine. It's ok...he's good. I was fortunate with my group. I have there Karen, my friend, Rose and Love Joy, my sisters in crime, Mc Rome, he's nothing, Daniel, the epal and Eloisa, the fat momma. We made a skit about a family.We had fun. All of us, the whole class.

Then we had a break. I ate my lunch with Karen and Annaliza. Then, we sat under the tree with our classmates and we chat with Sheka. She's nice. Then we went to our next class in the covered court. We just write our names for attendance and left. Early dismissal again!!

wow, I like Fridays!!

weeew...early dismissal again!!

hello!! haha..I was so happy this day. My class would start at 2:30 am and so I don't have to force myself to wake up early. It was a cold day. It rained very hard outside and the classes were suspended for elementary and highschool.(I wished I was high school)...

I woke up at 8, it's late actually, I have much things to do. I was lazy then, I don't want to go to school. But I have to. When I leave our house, it was not raining anymore. I left my younger sister alone. I went to Western Union in Las Piñas near SM Southmall first. I checked if my lola have already received the money my mom sent to them but it's still there.

I went to school. I was not late. I was 30 minutes early when I arrived there. I waited for Karen and her friend, Annaliza. I wasreading my book then. Then we went to school. I was nervous because that bitch lady guard again was there. Then when I went in she said "No, it's not allowed". I thought it was me. haha:)

Then we went to our first class, Math. It was fun. Our proffesor is good. I miss Sir Arman (my Math teacher in fourth year). He's really good in Algebra. I regret not listening to him in class and just sleeping there. But still I was happy.

After that we had our 30 minute break. Then we waited again for our next subject. But still we don't have our teacher so we all went home. It was early!! really!!!

thank God I was saved!

magsisimba pa tau aa..hello there! I wasn't able to post yesterday eventhough I came home early (I came home at 6:50 pm,, it was too early for me!). It's because I'm still too tired and I still have lots of things to do. But well, now, I will tell you about yesterday.

It was a very terrific day. I didn't expect it to be like that. You know, I don't want these kind of things to happen but it happens.

My class would start at 10 am and so I should leave home at 8am. But because I was busy surfing the net, I left at 8:30 (30 minutes is a big difference in my time!). I bought some fan, band aids and hair clips before I ride a jeep (I just want to include this). All the things happened before going to school is usual..me riding jeepneys, watching people around..all was usual. What is only different is the little disturbance in Muntinlupa because of a motorcycle accident. But it's not really bad. It was hardly raining. good thing I have my umbrella and I wore civilian clothes. I went to the entrance to wait for Karen. She arrived just in time, I did not wait too long for her compared yesterday.

In the main entrance of our school, I was not allowed to enter the campus because that bitch lady guard in the door said I was wearing a tokong and it's not allowed. I don't worry much because I have too many companions outside. The problem with the, is that they are in slippers. I waited there outside, actually for nothing. The bitch said that we should now go home because we're wasting our time there blocking the way. I hate her actually. From now on, I will be cursing her day by day!hehe...just kidding!

I was touched to Karen because she don't want to leave me all along in the entrance, She convinces me to enter at the new building (there is no guard there) or in the exit. But still I don't want. She really insist, but in the end, I won. I told her to go up and I'll be there soon. She's really worried about me.

While waiting, 2 of my classmates asked if I still want to enter the campus. Of course I want, for I was already too late for our first class. So they planned. The plan is, This girl in pink (girl#1) said that the girl in white (girl#2) will borrow my shoe because they both have slippers but girl #1 has a shoe. When they entered, they will go directly on the rest room and girl#1 will take off her pants and girl#2 will go out to give it to me. The plan worked. They both came up. I waited in the exit. While waiting, I saw 2 of my classmates again, Sheka and Ann. Ann was in slippers too. I asked Sheka if I could text from her phone because I don't have load. ahh, good thing Sheka is so good. I texted Papa to bring me pants but I forgot to mention where he would bring it- at home or at school.

Then girl#2 arrived. but she forgot my shoe! I was wearing her sandal so the bitch will still not allow me to enter eventhough I have already pants. So, we just go to the canteen and there I changed. Then the plan is, she will go up again and get my shoe. But she returned again asking for my COM because hers is not there and girl#1's is not there in the bag too. So I handed her my COM.



But unfortunately, I don't know what the hell happened to her...but I saw her go on the office with the guard (that guard is obviously the head of all the guards). From that moment, I already knew that we are caught in our act!!



I was quietly waiting outside when suddenly, that superior guard was calling out my name. I said I am "--" and he said I follow him. I entered from the exit (because it's where I was standing)...then this bitch lady guard was running towards us and said, "Hey, who allowed you to enter?". I pointed my index finger towards their superior and when she saw him it looks like she immediately hide in her shell..haha:)



We enter at the OSDS (I don't know what the hell it means..), there, I saw girl#2 sitting in front of a white table with a man sitting in front of her. I thought it was the 'prefect of discipline'. her soul is obviuosly not in her body, I mean she's really afraid what might happen to us. I sat on the chair next to her and there, they asked us what happened. Girl#2 is very honest. She tells everything...and so was I.



We told them about how it started, about the plan, what the hell will happen if we don't do it, the exchange of an important document which is the COM and everything!! That amazed them...I mean, they were shocked because we are girls, we should not have done things like that. The superior gusrd keep on telling about our major offense (exchanging documents and dishonesty is a major offense) and he said we'll probably be suspended for 10 school days! weeew!! That really got my nerves!!! I was getting nervous that time. I thought, what will happen to me for that 10 days?? How can I cope up with my subjects?? What will my parents say if they knew this?? oh...that really scared me..

The guard asked me if I know who the hell I handed my COM, I said she was my classmate but I don't know her name. That really sucks! They were all laughing. The guard asked me if I know the other suspect (girl#1), I said I know her in face but not in name. He told me to fetch her up from where she is. I was going out with my bag when the guard said I leave my bag there. I said my pants was there so I won't leave it. He allowed me to bring my bag the moment he knew that girl#1 doesn't have anything under her..:)

I fetched girl#1 and she was really nervous when she knew about what happened. She don't know what to do. I told her to just relax. When we arrived, weeew...I was really scared..the two of them start crying when the heard about our suspension..I also want to cry but I don't because if so, I will just be upset and regretful. I don't want to regret anything I've done, I always wanted to accept the consequences, good or bad, because it's what I choosed to do..so it means I am ready to accept everything.Well, I just keep on smiling and I showed confidence so that I won't feel bad. Our first class was over now. We waited for the 'prefect of discipline' (I don't know what they call it but it's what it was calle din my previous school) He immediately arrived and asked what happened to us. My two classmates (girl#1-Rose, girl#2-Love Joy) can't speak because of fear so I was the one who told everything to him. He laughed, yes, it's funny, I admit it...I also laughed in front of them while relating our story...then he let us write on a paper but he doesn't write our major offense, only those wearing slippers and tokong. Then he gave us advice. Then he said we won't have any suspension. Wow!! It's really nice!!!

Then, we went happily to our next class. good thing we still don't have our teacher yet. Then we changed our room and have our class in Science. It's boring. I felt sleepy. I'm not really interested with geology..Then after that we had our lunch break..it was too long. We just wander around and find a place to sit. Then we write our assignment in Filipino and English.

In our Filipino subject (it was in the speech laboratory), it was fun. I first thought our teacher is terror but she's not so...you know. Ah, It's boring too. The most interesting subject for me that day is our last subject, English. Our teacher is good, she's nice when she talk. She called me up for recitation, good thing I answered it confidently. But I miss teacher Louna a lot (she's my English teacher in fourth year)...she's really my idol...especially when it comes to the way she speaks. I really really miss her!!!

After my recitation, Ikept on talking with my seatmate, Karen, we talked about how corny our class is and we hate my other seatmate which is an emo. But I was sad because I've been so bad to her but she's really nice. haha..

Well, it's not a too bad day. I arrived home immediately. there are no heavy traffic anywhere!! It's nice!!!

heavy traffic causes headache...

yow! how your day?? Me? aw..I still want to sleep...I'm so tired about yesterday..

It was the second day of our class yeaterday. Good thing our class would start after lunch so I was busy watching "attic cat" while at home.

I was texting with Tony and Karen..Tony and I talking about her report and Karen about what to wear for school.

Karen decided to wear her uniform with me...for I left my jeans in Cavite (I am in Las Piñas by the way).

Tony, on the other hand, was worrying about her report in English. We keep on looking for books but none of them have her report. We decided to meet at starmall in Alabang. I am at the National Bookstore but still she's far on her way there, so I told her to go to SM Southmall so that she would find books for her report. I have to go that time because my class is getting near.

When I went outside the starmall, wow! It rained heavily. I can't do any but buy an umbrella which take my money away!:( Anyway, it's ok, the umbrella is cute and color pink!

Then, I was hurrying for school because Karen would wait there..but still I was the one who first came. Thank heavens Jean, one of our classmates, arrived and waited with me at the gate.

We entered the school. Ah, the temperature check is now over so we're fortunate. We are able to get in our first class. It was Algebra. Know what? we are only 7 in the room. Our professor waited long but no one came, so we started our class.

I really hate Math..I feel so sleepy everytime I was in that subject..

Hmm..my mind was sleeping when suddenly my classmates started to get up. It's already time, as they say. But when I looked at my cell phone to check the time, we still have 10 minutes left.

We walked through the corridors..then have one of our classmate's copy to have it photocopied. Then we went upstairs and loiter there. I was wondering why we should go all together (the 8 of us now)...so I told Karen we should get rid of them and find our own place. We went to NB4, a room without any class on going and write our lectures there. It was fun.

We find for our next class and waited for about 1 hour. Then, my crush, Rocky told us we can go home because our class is canceled.

I was so happy that we don't have class that early but sadly, I came home too late. It was already 9 when I got home. It's because of the heavy traffic in Muntinlupa, then in Alabang, then in front of Lianas.

I waited in line for a very long moment for a jeepney ride. There are lots of people but no jeepney wants to have a ride because the traffic in annex was too heavy. So I waited for Papa in SM. I called at home and I told Mama I am in National Bookstore. I entered there to browse some books. Someone called my name, wow! It's Christopher, my classmate in third year with Edward. There, we talked about a lot of things. I am so happy I met them..:)

after talking for about an hour, we departed. After a minute Papa came. We went home and really..I was very tired! But still, I'm so happy..:)

first day of school?? bboooorrriiinnnggg!!!!!!!

weeeew...I was so tired last night but still I woke up early today.



Yesterday is my first day of school...it was fun...:)

My class would start at 10 am and I left home at 8. My dad called in our house because before I went to school, I was too nervous for I thought my uniform is wrong. I called the office of our school and asked if I could be in civilian..well, yes, we're allowed.

My mom went to our house just before I go to school beause she was the one who received my messages. Then, I went to school. You know what? I have not comb my hair yet and no powder on my face..ah...I was really stupid!hehe..

It was a heavy traffic on the road..weeww..I'm already tired! Then, I came to school at 9:47...not bad.

what caused me so much disappointment is the long line beside the entrance. wow, you won't be in if you don't have that shit stamp on your wrist. And so, I have to be in line too. It was too hot. I was late. I know I wouldn't be able to get to my first subject. Well, it's ok for me..

when I was already near the tent where the temperature check was ongoing..I was very thankful when suddenly, all the students run to the covered court because it changed it's place! I have to be in another line again.

After 2 hours of standing, I'm finally finished. My temperature was 36.8. I went to our next class immediately. It was on the new building. wow, too hot outside but too windy inside!:)

In our room, I saw 5 gals. There is this one who kept talking and interviewing the one who enters. I was interviewed, but I'm not really interested with her though. So, to stop her, I read my book "The Cather in the Rye". but still, she would interrupt me. well, it's alright.

I was busy imagining the scenes that I was reading when someone hits my forehead. Ah, it's Karen, she's my friend because we've been together while enrolling.

We talked, went to c.r, eat food while there is our class (we don't have any teachers, there are only 7 of us in the room), we went to the nearby place to buy her 'sandwich' and we waited again in the room.

While we are talking, there is this guy who appeared and asked Karen about her lastname. Ah, they're the same. I think that guy likes Karen because he was very fascinated about her.:) Then, Jean, the one with us too during the enrollment came. She got our number and she is with us.

It's already our lunch break but still we're on the room. A proffesor came. He thought we are his students. We bid goodbye to him...ah,, poor prof he's only the one left in the room.

We all decided to go home. We have no classes yet and we have to take a rest. We are only six in the class after the lunch break..2 boys and 4 girls..

We go..and I went to Tony's place...we had a chat there.

It was a very tiring day..hope I would not do it again!:)

first day of school...

well i don't have much to say about my first day of school..it's just that I'm too nervous..

My problem is..what shall I wear?? My uniform or civillian??

my gosh..I don't want to go to school..I don't know what to do..This is my fist day and so, I don't want to be laughed by other people..ah!!

God, please help me out!! I'm begging you!!!

weeew...!! found it!!:)

hey!! haha..

a while ago, I felt so sad because I couldn't find any videos I can watch..I mean, Kim Rae Won's dramas..but fortunately, I found

www.mysoju.com

Thank to yahoo answers...I found it!! now I can still watch him..ah..I like it!!!

it ends up just like this...

oh..just finished watching "Which Star Are You From?"...



aww..it's so sad..I'd really miss watching it..well, it won't be away from me..as long as there is internet, I have it on my hand..:)



ahh..I really feel sad...why is that so?? I still have a lot of dramas to watch..but now I start missing 'him' so much...It's incredible..and unbelievable..



well, I would watch his shows for the rest of my life..and this feeling..I don't care..:)



http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=3243406A6F501CBD

It's impossible, so impossible for him to catch me..:'(

hahh...such a hot day...I've been sweating a lot since I woke up..

I just finished watching the 100th video of WsAyF..8 videos to go and that's it..I'll really miss this drama..

Everytime I see his face while watching this drama, of course there's a tingling effect on me..I really liked him...

but everytime I see him..I..I actually don't feel that good. I feel so sad though...why? It's because..it happened again..I now can see myself (again and again and again)...hoping inside a locked bottle that this man would open it. I keep hoping...knowing the fact that it's imposible that he will be the one who would open it. I'm so stocked..I don't know what to do. I hate this feeling...I feel so sorry for myself of not having him...even in my dreams..it seem very imposible.

well..what can I do?? this is it...I don't say that I don't want to feel this way towards him...I just don't like to admit that he'll never be mine...whatever I feel is nothing and be wasted sometime..

I wish that this heart would only beat up for the 'one'...the 'true one' because I don't want to feel the pain anymore...just give me the 'right one' so that I would stop hoping for nothing..It hurts a lot..really...

hide and seek??

a very tiring afternoon everyone!!

just got home from Sm Southmall..what I did there??

• i went to Western Union first to send money to Lola in Bicol
• i won an id lace from western union's scratch game.
• i walked through the long and hot road of Almanza..
• i waited for about a moment in front of Wendy's for Tony's arrival
• after 10 years of waiting, she arrived and we went to the cr for her to change her clothes..and for me to retouch my face..
• we entered in National Book Store and asked on the Costumer Service if the books we're looking for are available..
• while waiting for the sales lady's report, I'm moving my eye towards the books at her back to find "The Cather in the Rye"..and, I found it!!
• none of the books written in Tony's paper are available..except my "The Cather in the Rye"..
• unexpectedly, I bought that book...I really like it...luckily, I have enough money for it..
• while the cashier lady is punching my item, I'm praying that mama will understand why I have to use her money to buy that book:)
• I sent 2 blank messages to Tine's number..and guess what..she texted me back using her sister's sim..what an effort..i really appreciate it!
• sad but still determined to see the books, we went to McDo, just beside the NBS when Donard texted her that he'll go there too..
• we decided to trick Dony..we went upstairs and waited for him..
• while laughing out too loud, we saw Jheniece, our former classmate in high school..
• I really want to talk to her for long but Tony is very naughty..and Dony arrived immediately. but i'm not too bad, i made a conversation with Jhen for a while..
• We saw Dony waiting in front of McDo..we decided to go to Book Sale to look for the books..
• We're really bad. It took us very long time before we left BS. still sad because we haven't seen any books of hers..ah..
• we went to NBS again, but we took the other way so that Dony would not see us..he's still there..i feel sorry for him..but still Tony don't want to see him..
• we find books in the NBS, still none..we met her classmates in PATTS..they are not that friendly..:((
• while handling my fone, it's accesory suddenly broke up..i feel sad ..'coz it's from Roxie..poor dog it's headless..:(
• we prayed for a sign..if Dony is still there waiting it means we'll find the book.
• He's there..patiently waiting..i felt pity and i convinced Tony to meet him..i'm really afraid of Dony's reaction...but he's good. he's really really good..
• We eat..talk..and then go..
• we visited Dony's place in Veraville near SM..
• we walked through the deserted Alabang-Zapote road..
• i decided to take a jeep..
• they walked together..
• now i'm home!!!

It's a really nice day...We've been together for just a while but still it's so much fun. Roxie's not able to be with us 'coz she's with her family..ah..

Being with friends is definitely cool!! I miss them so much!!

all i've got to do is run...

weeew!! almost done! 4 episodes remaining..and it all ends up.
oh..I'll miss it...but then there are still a lot pending dramas starring KIM RAE WON that I have to watch..

It has been my stress reducer..well..i think it's because of what i feel..
I'm really happy seeing him..I don't get bored, I don't even experience hunger and thirst. I forget everything..everything..

His face, his words, his body, his everything..it makes me insane. I even unintentionally bought a book that reminds me of him..well, i don't regret it..i don't want to feel regret of everything i do..in my every decision..

it's what i want..so i'll do it..for whatever makes my heart happy will do..

hah..i'm a fool..i don't even say things in harmony..i'm all messed up..ahh!!! but i love it...!!

Hope..I hope..i..

i really miss her...

yeah..how you doin' guys??

hmm..just got home..i slept in Cavite last night that's why I haven't posted any..

ah..i just opened my fsa while ago...and ther's a lot of comments from my friend, Christine.

well, to tell you honestly, she's so annoying for me. With all the friends I have..she's so different.

She never stops until she wins an argument..(but difeerent between us because I always win..)
She don't cry in front of you on things like lovelife, or whatever..except when it comes to grades..(well, she value her studies much!)
She's bright and trying hard..
She's so good that every people around her abuses her..(and that's what I hate most..)

There are still so many things about her..but these are the only things I hardly understand about her..why?? because we are alike..

I don't want to see or meet a person like me...it feels like..ah..i don't know..

I can't believe until now that we have been together for a year and it was so happy..really..

we never meet after our graduation last March..We don't text each other so often..but...something touched my heart these past few days..

she keep on sending me comments on my friendster account..at first, we are arguing because I told her I hate her...but we settled it all out and now, we're fine. She told me that she misses me..really..she even said that she want to meet me..

it was so touching..it made me cry..

i will never forget her..she'll always be in my mind and in my heart,,

no one can ever replace her...she's unique..

she's my one and only enemy..:)


[enemy-this is how i call my true friends..]

nothing important...(^_^)V

hey there! this is my first post for this blog...

hmm...I'm actually so excited for my first post but...I'm running out of time..I have to take a bath and eat some brunch..

you know, i woke up early this morning and I immediately opened my computer. You know what?? I started watching 'which star are you from' from 8:30 am until now. but I have to stop, because my tummy now longs for food..haha:)

I'm currently addicted to Kim Rae Won..duh! he's so so so cute!!! actually, I've watch WsAyF before but now I still waste my time for it..I don't even want to eat now just to see his face!!

well..I have to go now..I have to brush my teeth first!! joke!:)

well, i would watch again after I eat..maybe at 12!!haha..

I don't eat fast but I have to do it now or else..I'll miss KIM RAE WON so much!!!

I will be posting his pictures maybe after I finish watching everything..and might as well I'll link all his videos here!!! wait for it!!


I love Korean Dramas so much!!! Please watch it too!!!



I Love KIM RAE WON!!!!!wooohooooo!!!!