I hate it when you leave. I want you to stay.

Bakit ganon?? Nababaliw na talaga ko!!!!

I hate myself for it.

I'm tired of rejection.

I couldn’t take it anymore.
I made up an excuse, and I texted you…because it’s been five days, and I felt like I was dying without you.
I know you’ll probably stop texting me soon enough. You never say goodbye anymore…you just leave. And I sit around and check my phone every 5 minutes or so, hoping that eventually you’ll message me back. This all makes me sound horribly desperate, I know…but I truly can’t help myself. 

------------------------------------

This is exactly how I felt. I've read this on tumblr.

Ouch. T_T

Gusto talaga kita makita. Alam mo yun. Makita lang kita .. kahit malayo .. ok na ko.

KAILAN BA KO MAGIGING IMPORTANTE SAYO?

And that someone is YOU.

Ineedyouasinsobra.

Yun lang naman hinihintay ko e .. yung magic words.

THE CHOICE IS YOURS.

EVERY MORNING YOU HAVE TWO CHOICES:

CONTINUE YOUR SLEEP WITH DREAMS

OR

WAKE UP AND CHASE YOUR DREAMS.

Honestly? I'd choose to continue my sleep especially if my dreams involves you and what happens is that YOU ARE MINE AND I AM YOURS. I would never ever wake up and I'd really beg the Lord to keep me asleep. If it's the only way I could have you with me, then I'll desperately grab that opportunity. Well, with the other choice, I know that waking up would only make me upset. Reality strikes. No matter how I try, I would never ever chase my dream anymore .. and that is, to have you. 

But unfortunately, I have woke up this morning and I missed the time we're together in my dream. I hate waking up .. really. Knowing that she has you and you're both happy, it kills me. Well, I should be happy for you. But  .. I really love you. I want you. I need you. I miss you. I wish I could tell all those words to you .. and I really wish you would tell it to me too ... but of course, it would never happen.

EVERYTHING.

Hell Right. :/

Kaya naman pala. Eh ano nga naman ba ako sayo diba??

Waa!!!! Ayoko na!!!! T _ T  oo na .. wala na ko sayo .. wala akong kwenta .. wala kang pakialam sakin ... nakakainis alam mo yun? Gusto kong maging importante din sayo. Gusto kong maging mahalaga sayo .. gusto kong ... MAHALIN MO RIN AKO... pero pano??? pano??? Ayoko na .. ayoko na talaga. Kung di rin lang ikaw wag na lang. Bat ba kasi nakilala pa kita? Bakit kailan kong mahirapan ng ganito???

Kailan mo ba 'ko mamimiss? Ako na lang ba lagi ha??

The Broken Heart Syndrome

“I often wake up in the middle of the night thinking I’m dying. My heart is broken.”

I MISS YOU SO MUCH. T _ T

It hurts to breathe

I miss you so much

I feel it beneath my skin

through my muscle

inside of my bones. ....

Nadedepress nanaman ako .. :'(

Ewan ko ba. Bat ganun? Pag masaya ako as in sobra tapos pag malungkot sobra din. Ampangit kasi isang buhos lahat. Dapat balanse. Di tulad nito. Di maayos sa pamilya, sa friends, tapos broken hearted pa. Hay. Ayoko ng ganito. Kailan kaya yung time na puro masaya na lang. Ang hirap ng ganito. Sobrang nawawalan nanaman ako ng gana sa buhay ko. hay ....