iKR?!

ooooooookkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!!!!!!!!! so I'm here again .. and .. I have no resolutions yet!!! LOL!

Anyhow, I'm starting a new progress like.... not connecting / relating anything to that person. I know that would be really good. :D I'm sleepy now, so I guess this is all for now. :)))) 


Good vibes for tomorrow! 

STOP BOTHERING ME PLEASE, GOOD MEMORIES.

Yes,  you've read it right. Good memories. And how am I supposed to forget those? I don't know either. They say that it is not possible to forcefully forget something unless you had amnesia or Alzheimer's disease. Well, I really wish I had, just so I would be able to move forward continuously.  Ok, so it started just now. While I was turning on this computer, a thought popped up in my mind, telling me that I should visit our email accounts. It has been half a year since I last checked it out. Anyways, I end up crying like hell and realizing that I'm still affected at this point in time. Imagine how worst I could be if I actually came face-to-face with that person, knowing that a memory just like that could break me down so easily. I pity myself for it, especially the fact that I browsed the internet on how to forget the past purposefully. But I can't blame myself for being so desperate to search for an immediate cure for this craziness. I mean, I've been hurt so bad it won't be good to make myself believe that everything's all right when in fact, it's not. It would only worsen my situation and forgetting would be harder. 

I don't have any resolutions yet, and I'll have to think of it as I eat dinner tonight. After that, I'll post again if I have thought about something good (but I won't promise I would). I'll go now. 


by the way, this is the site I've searched for. you wouldn't know, maybe you'll need it one of these days ....... just kidding. :)
http://www.wikihow.com/Purposefully-Forget-Things








AFK

Kailan kaya ako.....

-magkakaroon ng pera para makarating sa iba't ibang lugar, mabili ang mga bagay na gusto kong mabili, makabili ng pinapangarap kong condo unit, makabili ng kotse, mabili ang lahat ng sapatos at bag na gusto ko, mabili ang lahat ng pagkaing gusto kong kainin, mabili ang lahat ng gusto nila Mama, Papa at kapatid ko, at higit sa lahat, yung di na ako makakaramdam na kulang ang pera na meron ako???

-makakapag-travel sa lahat ng places na gusto kong marating in and out of the country?

-gaganda?? yung kahit pimple free lang na mukha at isama mo na ang peklat free na katawan????

-se-sexy, yung tamang katawan lang, hindi masyadong malaking binti, bewang, tiyan at braso?????

:::::ito ang dahilan kung bakit gusto ko ng mag-quit sa Facebook. Source lang yun ng insecurities kO! bat naman kasi eh! :/

#ANGHIRAPMAGINGTULADKO

#ANGSARAPMAGSUICIDEASINNGAYONNA

#INSECURETALAGAAKOKAASARLANG

#FEELINGHASHTAGBAKITBA

#BUTIPASILA

#UNFAIRTALAGAANGBUHAYATSORRYTOSAYPEROMALASKOTALAGA

#BAKITGANON

A funny thought before I go back to sleep -- modern reality sucks! XD

A nice thought before I go back to sleep :)

I'll have to do this now or I will in my class. :?

On this scene I will surely not be able to focus studying. BASED ON EXPERIENCE.

I just love learning .. falalalalala!

It's 6:36 AM on my clock and I'm here sitting in front of my computer, doing all the researching. If not with that mad rat in my sister's room, I doubt it if I'm awake by now.

Anyway, the mad rat thingy have brought about a good start for my day. I'm here studying, and I myself can't believe what I'm doing. I've just finished researching for my sister's assignment and I'm currently downloading pdfs for my own early this morning! haha! I'm feelin' productive right now.

You know how I hate the word and the feeling REGRET, but I openly admit that just a while ago, I have undergone such. I regret loving learning just now, when all I have was a year left in school. But after a minute of despair, I realized how lucky I am to think about studying as an enjoyable thing. I'm still lucky, if you know what I mean. It's never too late though, because I'm still young for my age and I believe that I'm on the right track. Yeah! \m/

I'm feeling all sleepy now. I guess I'll have to take a nap or else I will be dying again in class later this afternoon.  I don't want that to happen, because I really love learning and hearing important information and I can feel it in my nerves. No kidding. You may call me sick right now but it's true. :) And besides, I want to watch a lot of cartoons from 8AM which means I don't have time to sleep from that point of time. :)

I'll just do a couple of posts and that's it. I'll try to sleep again. :)

depressing.

mahirap mabuhay sa mundong pilit kang isinusuka. ... ~~~ -feeling suicidal

 the downside of loving someone so much --- you can’t live without them.

If I could, then I would. :P

Looking forward for this. :D

I HOPE NOT.

and in my heart of course. until that day. the day that we'll meet again. i swear you'll never be gone again. 

I doubt it if I could actually speak if I imagined you were there. All I want to do is to kiss you, whether you're physically present or just a mere imagination. And you know what? I would offer my life just so I could stare in that situation forever. That's why I haven't tried to do so. 

♥let's make a difference each day! :D

Thank God for the blessings in spite of life's difficulties :D

I woke up early because I was supposed to have a class at 8AM. Good thing I texted one of my classmates to clarify things and he sent the changed schedule of our classes. I now have a 3PM class instead of the earlier mentioned, so I was able to sleep more and enjoy the cold breeze brought by the rainy season. 

My first day in school was good enough. I wasn't late because I came earlier than my professor. haha. Anyway, the big smile on the face of one of my classmates made me feel better as I walk in our room. And well, his welcoming voice and friendly greeting added to the good start of my day. I didn't feel empty and alone because I have three of my classmates seat with me in the empty side of the room (empty because 90% of my classmates are on the other side, as if our room is limited only to that space). I finished the whole session and didn't regret my decision to go to school despite the insistent announcement of my schoolmate that there will only be a discussion today. Well, I've learned a lot of things today which I doubt I can gain in any other days of my life.

Anyhow, the bad news is, I was so excited to go home that I forgot my umbrella in our classroom. :/ 

So before I went to our room and enjoy the class, I've met one of my schoolmates in the stairs as I was going up, but I didn't bother to throw her a smile. I know it's not right, but I can't lie to her, because I really feel bad. Not because I'm sick physically, but I am emotionally towards her because of reasons that I don't want to take up now. I feel so bad about her that I literally posted my feelings in Facebook, but eventually I hid it because I don't want her to feel bad. And well, if she doesn't want me in her life then let it be. Anyway, my life became better when a number of people were put away in my life, though of course it saddens me. This is why I don't want any commitments anymore.

On the contrary, a blessing came to while I was walking outside our school in my way home. I checked my mobile phone and saw a text message telling that I qualified as a test administrator (where I applied and had my written exam yesterday). I don't know if being qualified is the same as being hired, but I'm so happy about it! :) Tomorrow will be an orientation and I have to be there at 8:30AM. I hope and I pray that this is it. I know God will help me on that job as He helped me in applying there. God is really good. In spite of my short comings, He's still good to me. 

Many bad things happen, but it's up to us whether to put our eyes on it or sort out and pick the more than many good things that happen each day. ~

~~~

Thank you so much Lord for this day. Please guide me as I go to the orientation tomorrow. I love you Lord! :D 

♥rainy morning ~