Dreams.

I like dreams. I love them actually. Why? Because a dream is the only possible way to make your impossible wishes come true. Like, I always want to have this someone with me, and we can only be together in my dreams. Whenever I dream about this, I really wish I won't wake up anymore. But sometimes, everything just don't go with what you want .. during the climax, someone will wake you up and afterwards ... you end up forgetting everything that happened in your dream.

I like dreams because there, life seems to be perfect. Most of the things (the good ones) that happen is in line with what you are actually been waiting for too long to take place in reality. My frustrations, my failures, ... they're gone. Everything is just so perfect, you would never wish to stay out of it.

But of course, there are nightmares, the ones you never ever want to have and to get out too soon. Nightmares appear more realistic, which I really wonder why. For example, in your nightmare you are stabbed, it's as if you are really in that situation and you can feel the pain. But in dreams, it barely happens. I couldn't even feel my loved one's hug there, but seeing him do it to me is enough.

I have never dreamed of myself getting killed or dying. I don't want to see the killing, I just want to dream about me, just sleeping and then never ever came to consciousness again. At least, in my dream, it happened. I want a peaceful death. Everything around me is so miserable and messy, so I just wish that I could obtain the peace that I have been wanting in my death. At least in my death.